All my life I've been a quitter and I'm not ashamed to admit it. I can't say that this is something I'm proud of, but I must say that it is something I believe has been necessary in order for me to retain the opportunity to reach my full life potential.
I've had some good jobs in my life, and I've quit them all. I just walked away from them without any hesitation. I didn't care about the money or the prestige of the position. I knew they were places that I didn't belong.
I've had to endure great judgment and persecution for being a quitter. In some cases, it has cost me nearly everything. Most others think I'm crazy. They think I'm irresponsible and unrealistic. They become infuriated with my decisions, and they abandon me in them. For most of my life, I've had to walk alone.
Still, I carry on, knowing that I am here on a mission. My mission is to find the greater way, never selling out to a lesser, more convenient, offer. It is a lonely road, but one that I must travel.
Years ago, I remember my ex father-in-law being very upset with me about a decision I made. I remember him asking me, "Do you want to know what your problem is? Can you handle it if I tell you?" I told him that I did want to know his opinion of what my problem was, and that I could handle it. He said, "Ok, you asked for it! Here's the problem with you. You're a quitter."
It hurt me to know this is how he saw me, because I knew it wasn't true. How can you make someone see something that he or she hasn't the ability to see? My ex father-in-law was looking through eyes of emotion and pride rather than through the eyes of faith and love.
Growing up, I had a very wise grandmother who taught me some important lessons. The first thing she taught me was that everyone has a calling, something particular to do in life. I asked her, "Grandma, how do you know when you are called to do a particular thing?" She replied. "You will know that you are called to do something when you find that you are miserable to your soul when you are not doing it. This calling will not leave you alone. It will not allow you to have peace until you answer it, and nothing else you attempt to do will bring you any true success or satisfaction."
After 46 years of trial and error, I have found my grandmothers words to be true. There is a calling upon my life, and it demands my full attention. Nothing else has ever satisfied me, and nothing else ever will. I must answer my calling, and I've always known this. That's why I quit everything. I know in my heart that these other offers are only to distract me away from the higher place meant for me to find.
The second lesson I learned from my grandmother was about sensing the spirit that dwells in a particular place or situation. She once said to me, "If you don't feel the power of the Holy Spirit in the place where you are at, you need to immediately get up, leave and go elsewhere." Although, at the time, I knew she was referring to church services, I understood that this lesson is good advice for any situation.
It may sound to you like I am a lost and miserable soul. I assure you that I am not. I know my future shines with promise and hope! I know the more I resist the norm, the closer I get to my true destiny. It's an exciting adventure! You really should try it. It's the only way to live, I honestly believe.
So what is it that I am really trying to say here? I am saying that we need to follow our hearts, and not sell our lives short out of fear of rejection. We need to trust and believe in our calling and have the courage to follow wherever it may lead us. Only by so doing will we ever find true peace, happiness and contentment in our lives.
I believe that no matter who you are there is greatness living within you, waiting to appear. We all have a calling to do something spectacular with our lives. That particular calling is something different for each one of us. We need to search our hearts and find out what it is. Then we need to pursue it, and never look back.
Sometimes great things happen in the smallest ways. Yesterday I helped a very elderly woman carry her groceries from her car into her house. I could see the bags were much too heavy for her to carry. It was a small gesture of kindness on my part, but it meant so much to her. I believe it made her day. Through me, she saw a higher place, and it gave her life hope and inspiration.
I want to do great things, consistently, in my life, even if I have to do them in the smallest of ways. We are all capable of doing this much... No one can say she or he did not have the opportunity. Opportunities to do great things are all around us. It's only a matter of how great do we want to be? I, personally, wish to live my life doing extraordinary things all the time, not just occasionally.
My goal in life is to position myself to where I am able to live and walk in the light every minute of every day. I need freedom, not burdens, with loads of responsibility and debt, to the point where I am unable to see the needs of others or serve anything else.
There is an element of human action I call the "Wow Factor." The "Wow Factor" makes jaws drop, when it happens. Such acts make us gasp and say, "Wow! That's amazing!" I believe we all have that potential within us. The potential to perform acts that make others stop and say, "Wow" I believe every one of us needs to find that place in life where we can make such an impact on others. We need to find our gifts and talents and use them to make the world a better place.
Yeah, maybe in the eyes of many I have lived the life of a quitter. I'm sorry they see things that way. I know that I'm not, quite the contrary, in fact. I am a fighter for life and freedom. A rebel, if you will. By refusing to join the norms of society, I have proven that I am one who refuses to conform to the restless ways of the masses. I choose to reach for the higher places in life, often seen and disguised as lowly places.
If you want to call me a quitter for doing that, go ahead. I'll live with it.
M Adam Roberts lives and writes from Clearwater, Florida.
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